Should Someone Get Back With Their Ex Back?

For whatever reason, one may have just broken up with their partner, which could mean that they are not in a good way. Perhaps one is experiencing a fair amount of sadness, along with feeling depressed from time to time.

There could also be moments when one ends up getting angry and is even consumed by rage. Either way, it is going to be a challenge for them to experience inner peace at this point in their life.

A Different Outcome

Alternatively, one could be relieved that their relationship has come to and this can mean that they don’t have trouble embracing the present moment. This doesn’t mean that they won’t ever feel sad, though.

The big difference is that what has taken place won’t have had a big impact on their inner world. This can then allow one to make a fairly smooth transition from one stage of their life to another.

The Reason

What this can show is that this person was not in a relationship that was very fulfilling. One would have come to see that their time together had come to an end and this will make it easier for them to put this phase of their life behind them.

If one was in a relationship that wasn’t very fulfilling yet they are not in a good way, it can be a sign that something else is going on for them. Perhaps they were carrying a lot of emotional pain before they got into this relationship and therefore, the end of the relationship has brought it up to the surface.

Another Scenario

Then again, if one does feel fine but their relationship was going well, it could show that one has disconnected from their pain. One can then believe that they are fine, as can the people in their life, yet this will be an illusion.

And, if ones relationship was going well and they are in a lot of pain, what they are going though will be perfectly normal. They will have experienced loss and this will have caused them to experience grief.

A Process

It is unlikely that they will be able to think their way out of what is going on; what they will most likely need to do is to feel their way out. This is then going to be a time when they will be surrendering to how they feel as opposed to trying to change how they feel.

Embracing how they feel, and allowing themselves to cry out the pain that is within them, will almost certainly help. If they are a woman it might be easier for them to do this than if they are man, due to the fact that is often more acceptable for a woman to express her emotions.

An Interruption

No matter what one is going through at this time in their life, they might end up hearing from their ex. This could be a time when their ex will basically ask them if they would like to get back together.

Conversely, a mutual friend could end up asking them if they would get back with their ex, after their ex has asked them to find out. This could be the last thing that they wanted to hear or it could be something that they are only too happy to hear.

The Next Step

If one is not interested in getting back with their ex, it may be easy for them to make this clear and for their ex to get this message. Their ex will then leave them alone if they respect them and have good boundaries.

At the same time, after having been asked this, one could end up feeling confused, not knowing what to do. What this is then likely to show is that they are experiencing inner conflict.


One thing that they can then do is to think about what their relationship was like before and if they want to experience more of the same. If they were in an abusive relationship or even one had had run its course, there is going to be no reason for them to restart the relationship.

If it was going well or there was only a minor problem, then it might be a good idea for them to get back with their ex. Along with thinking about what their relationship was like, it will be important for them to tune into themselves.


By tuning into what is taking place within them, they will be able to see what parts of them want to go back and what parts don’t. If they find that there is a strong pull in their chest to go back with them, it could show that they feel abandoned.

In this case, their need to get back with their ex can be more about avoiding how they feel than being with someone who they truly want to be with. Being with their ex can then allow them to feel better in the short-term but it won’t serve them in the long-term.


What this illustrates of how important self-awareness is when it comes to making a good decision. Without this, someone can end up making a decision that they will end up regretting.
If one can see that they are in a lot of pain and it is not possible for them to handle this pain, they may need to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided by the assistance of a therapist or a healer.

Teacher, prolific writer, author, and consultant, Oliver JR Cooper, hails from England. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation, including love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With over two thousand in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behaviour, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice.

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